Therapy Pets for Grieving Families

 

Grief is complicated for anyone to process, and when you’re overwhelmed with emotions, it can be difficult to reach out for help. In these situations, many people turn to therapy pets for comfort and support. Therapy pets during grief are so popular that more funeral homes are beginning to have therapy dogs and cats on hand to help families through the funeral planning process! But therapy dogs aren’t just another furry friend to have around– there are several benefits to having a therapy pet while healing from a loss.

If you’re considering getting a therapy pet to help you cope with a loss, then read on for some of the best benefits of therapy pets for grieving families: 

• Mood Boost. Having a pet can boost your mood– studies show that even just petting a dog can boost serotonin and dopamine levels in your brain, improving your overall mood and making you feel happier. Stroking a pet can also lower your blood pressure and make you feel less lonely. Think of a pet as a natural painkiller that also happens to be an adorable and kind friend!
•  Speechless Therapy. After experiencing a loss, many people are at a loss for words or do not know how to express their feelings in words. Some people are uncomfortable speaking about their deep feelings to another person. It is especially true of children who may be experiencing loss for the first time and aren’t comfortable sharing feelings with adults. Therapy pets are a great way for people of all ages to communicate their feelings without worrying about getting a response. Speaking your thoughts can be helpful, and a therapy pet will listen without judgment.
• Movement. Therapy pets, particularly therapy dogs, require care, often including physical exercise or activity. Dogs must be walked multiple times daily, forcing you out of the house to exercise with them. Exercise and fresh air will improve your mood and decrease your stress levels while giving you a sense of control of your life again.
• Self-Care. People going through grief also neglect their own self-care. Having a pet you need to take care of will remind you of what you need to do for yourself— exercise is one of them. Grooming, feeding, and even showing your pet affection will remind you to do the same things for yourself, giving you the self-care you need to heal and recover.

Adolf Funeral Home and Cremation Services prides itself on providing exemplary customer service. We take every measure to ensure you are satisfied with all your funeral planning and burial needs during this sensitive time of grief and mourning. Our staff will do whatever it takes to make our workplace environment positive, which translates to your experience with us.

Adolf Funeral Home and Cremation Services has served the Berwyn and Willowbrook areas for many years. We pride ourselves on being large enough to provide professionalism and reliability yet small enough to provide personalized service. To discover more about how we can serve your needs, please visit our website or call one of our locations today.

Sources:

https://esacare.com/turn-grief-into-joy-with-emotional-support-animal/

https://www.obannonfuneralhome.com/animals-and-grief

https://www.frazerconsultants.com/2017/07/ruff-times-how-therapy-dogs-help-the-grieving/

What You Should (and Shouldn’t) Leave at a Grave

 

The loss of a loved one is a difficult thing for anyone to process. Though they may be gone, we continue wanting to honor their life and cherish the memories we shared with them. Many people find comfort in visiting the graves of those who passed, strengthening the feeling that they are still watching over us even if they are gone. In the United States, it is common for people to leave a small token or decoration at the grave to show love and respect.

While many different items are considered "acceptable" to be left at a grave, there are a few basic rules of cemetery etiquette that you should follow to show respect to the entire cemetery. Let's review some of the things that you should and shouldn't leave at a grave.

Things You Should Leave at a Grave

•  Flowers. Fresh flowers are one of the most universally accepted things to leave at a grave site to honor and respect the dead. It is a beautiful way to commemorate your loved one, while bringing natural beauty and color to their gravestone. Leave them in a bouquet, or some gravestones will have a built-in vase for the flowers. Just ensure you're following any rules the cemetery may have about what kinds of flowers you can leave—for example, anything that could be poisonous to wildlife that circles through the cemetery.
• Flags. Leaving a small flag by their grave on holidays, such as Memorial Day or Veteran's Day, is respectful if your loved one served in the military. When choosing a flag, make sure it isn't too large, as this can distract other mourners. Additionally, if it's raining, you may not want to leave an American flag out, as this can be viewed as disrespectful.
• Coins. Leaving coins at a grave is also universally acceptable, and many cultures worldwide leave coins to show respect for the dead. The military, in particular, has a tradition of leaving coins at graves, with different coins having different meanings. Pennies signify you didn't know the dead but want to show respect, nickels mean you went to the same boot camp, dimes mean you served together, and quarters mean you were present when the loved one died.
• Stones. Per Jewish tradition, leaving small stones or pebbles on graves is common. Historically, this was to protect the loved one's grave from evil spirits and protect it from any animals that might pass by. Most people prefer to leave stones as the elements will not damage them. You can choose various stones, including birthstones, crystals, or rocks with special memories attached to them (like a pebble from a beach you and your loved one visited). 
  

What You Shouldn't Leave at a Grave

Though this can vary, the generally accepted rule is that you should not leave things that break the cemetery's rules or anything that the elements can damage. This includes: 

•  Fencing around the gravestone
•  Vases
•  Stuffed animals
• Plants and flowers that may be poisonous to wildlife, including poinsettias or holly berries

Talk with the groundskeepers at the cemetery to confirm what is allowed so you can show your love and respect without breaking any rules.

Adolf Funeral Home and Cremation Services prides itself on providing exemplary customer service. We take every measure to ensure you are satisfied with all your funeral planning and burial needs during this sensitive time of grief and mourning. In addition, our staff will do whatever it takes to make sure our positive workplace environment translates to your experience with us.

Adolf Funeral Home and Cremation Services has served the Berwyn and Willowbrook areas for many years. We pride ourselves on being large enough to provide professionalism and reliability yet small enough to provide personalized service. To discover more about how we can serve your needs, please visit our website or call one of our locations today.

 

Sources:

https://dying.lovetoknow.com/about-obituaries-memorials/what-leave-at-grave-practical-meaningful-ideas

https://www.joincake.com/blog/what-to-leave-at-a-grave/

https://www.evrmemories.com/decorating-the-grave-of-a-loved-one

Ways to Accept Death

 

Death is, unfortunately, a natural and inevitable part of the life cycle. Though most of us may not actively think about our own death, accepting that death is a part of life can be a healthy way to help us live our lives to the fullest. This is especially true for older adults and senior citizens who may be closer to the end of their lives or making plans for after their death.

No matter where you are in life, it’s never too early or too late to start emotionally preparing yourself for this difficult subject. Here are a few different tips and ways to help you accept death:

·       Talk About It. Death is often considered a taboo subject in our society, but the truth is that talking about death and connecting with others can make us more comfortable with the idea and process of dying. Talking about death will help you understand your feelings about death while comparing others’ thoughts and opinions with your own. Finding a healthy way to communicate your fears or questions about death is an effective way to process your feelings.

·       Educate Yourself. Take some time to read and learn about death. Some find that learning about how death is discussed in other cultures, religions, and societies can positively affect how they think about life. You may learn of a ritual or philosophy that is comforting to you that you never knew about!

·       Review Your Own Life. Take stock of your own life and think about what you’ve done and accomplished. Once you’ve realized all the wonderful things you’ve done, you may recognize how well-lived a life you have had. Many people fear death less once they’ve realized they have accomplished many of the things they’ve wanted to and have no regrets.

·       Practice Mindfulness. Practicing mindfulness can help you live in the moment while removing any anxiety you may have about dying. Breathe deeply and let your thoughts float by, taking note of your thoughts without judgment. Sit comfortably and try to relax as you complete the exercise. Work with a mindfulness coach to help you—remember that mindfulness takes practice, but the more you do it, the more at ease you’ll feel, and the more you’ll be able to live in the moment!

·       Appreciate Life. On that note, appreciate life! Recognizing your mortality may give you a renewed appreciation for life, helping you live your life to the fullest. Take the time to do things on your “bucket list” and genuinely enjoy yourself. Look for the little things in life that you love and let them energize you. Living your life to the fullest is the best way to achieve peace and understanding. 

Adolf Funeral Home and Cremation Services prides itself on providing exemplary customer service. We take every measure to ensure you are satisfied with all your funeral planning and burial needs during this sensitive time of grief and mourning. In addition, our staff will do whatever it takes to make our workplace environment positive, which translates to your experience with us.

Adolf Funeral Home and Cremation Services has served the Berwyn and Willowbrook areas for many years. We pride ourselves on being large enough to provide professionalism and reliability yet small enough to provide personalized service. To discover more about how we can serve your needs, please visit our website, or call one of our locations today.

 

Sources:

https://www.artofdyingwell.org/talking-about-death/coming-terms-death/accepting-your-mortality/

https://www.joincake.com/blog/mortality/

https://dying.lovetoknow.com/coping-grief/learning-how-accept-death-your-own-mortality

How to Clean a Headstone

 

Gravestones are a beautiful way to commemorate the memory of a loved one and can last for generations upon generations. Over time, however, headstones can accumulate a build-up of grime and dirt that can seriously ruin the overall look of the stone. To keep headstones looking their best, plan to do periodic, gentle cleanings of the stone to remove any of that outdoor build-up.

Cleaning a gravestone requires careful motions and specific tools and materials to keep the stone safe during cleaning. These materials include: 

• Five gallons of water. The cemetery likely won't have a water source for you to connect to, so make sure you bring plenty of water to use!
• Soft brushes and sponges. Make sure you're using natural materials free of dyes, not to transfer any color to the headstone. You'll also want a soft brush with natural bristles and a sponge without the rough side to prevent scratches.
• Scrapers. For areas needing more help, use a wooden or plastic scraper to remove any dirt and debris stuck on or in a small crevice. Avoid using any metal to prevent scratches.
• Towels. Use soft, large towels to dry off the headstone when finished. 

Once you've gathered your materials, follow these steps to ensure a smooth and safe process: 

1. Pick a day with mild weather to clean the headstone. If it is too hot, water can evaporate too quickly.
2. Start to remove any build-up from the headstone. Start with larger pieces of dirt, using your scrapers and pickers to help remove it. Do your best to go slowly and carefully to avoid damaging the stone.
3. Start gently cleaning your stone using your water supply, sponge, and brushes. Keep the stone wet throughout the process, as dry cleaning can damage the stone. Start at the bottom and work your way up to prevent dirty water from dripping. Repeat as needed until the headstone is clean. Make sure you're using your clean water supply throughout and that you're NOT using any soap or chemical material.
4. Once cleaned to your satisfaction, dump the rest of your clean water over the stone to rinse the gravestone.
5. Dry the stone with towels.

Adolf Funeral Home and Cremation Services prides itself on providing exemplary customer service. We take every measure to ensure you are satisfied with all your funeral planning and burial needs during this sensitive time of grief and mourning. Our staff will do whatever it takes to make our workplace environment positive, which translates to your experience with us. 

Adolf Funeral Home and Cremation Services has served the Berwyn and Willowbrook areas for many years. We pride ourselves on being large enough to provide professionalism and reliability yet small enough to provide personalized service. To discover more about how we can serve your needs, please visit our website, or call one of our locations today.

 

Sources:

https://www.funeralhelpcenter.com/how-to-clean-a-cemetery-tombstone-or-marker/

https://ohsospotless.com/how-to-clean-a-gravestone/

https://www.headstonehub.com/blog/how-to-clean-a-headstone

Grieving During the Holidays

 

Grief is complicated for anyone to process, but it can be especially difficult to navigate during the holiday season. Whether you’re coping with a recent or distant loss, the holiday season is a time full of celebrating traditions with family and friends, and it’s natural to feel an overwhelming sense of grief during this time. Remember, there’s no timetable or correct way to process grief, and feelings can come in waves. Understanding how these feelings affect you is essential so that you know how to deal with your grief.

Here are some helpful tips if you or a loved one are grieving during the holidays: 

·       Fill Gaps. You might see gaps in your holiday plans now that you’re coping with losing a family member or loved one. For example, did grandpa always dress up as Santa Claus, or did your cousin host the holiday party? Who organizes and brings the food? These roles will need to be filled. Try to plan how and who can fill these roles ahead of the holiday season so that it’s easier when the holidays come around.

·       Fill Your Schedule. Stay busy if you can and fill your schedule with events to spend time with your loved ones. It can help you avoid unnecessary moments of grief, and spending time with other friends and family can help make the holiday season even more enjoyable.

·       Set Boundaries. Though staying busy is certainly good, it’s also okay to set boundaries with yourself and others during this difficult time. Participate and attend whatever feels comfortable to you. Remember that even though there may be pressure to go to different events and parties, it’s essential to put your needs first. Commit to the events you think you can handle and remind yourself that you don’t need to stay the entire time if you don’t want to.

·       Feel Your Emotions. Tune in to your emotions and feel both the positive and negative feelings you may have while grieving. Remember that it’s okay to miss your loved one and still have a fun time celebrating during the holidays! If you’re feeling more negative feelings than positive, or if you’re feeling overwhelmed, reach out for professional help from your health team, counseling, or support group.

·       Honor Traditions, While Creating New Ones. Create new traditions during the holidays with the people you have around you. New practices don’t replace old ones! Try a new seasonal dessert or play a fun game with a new group of people. It will be enjoyable for you and will also help you look forward to next year. It can also feel therapeutic to honor your old traditions without your loved one—this beautifully shows respect and remembrance. 

Adolf Funeral Home and Cremation Services prides itself on providing exemplary customer service. We take every measure to ensure you are satisfied with all your funeral planning and burial needs during this sensitive time of grief and mourning. We will do whatever it takes to make our positive workplace environment translate to your experience with us. 

Adolf Funeral Home has served the Berwyn and Willowbrook areas for many years. We pride ourselves on being large enough to provide professionalism and reliability yet small enough to provide personalized service. To discover more about how we can serve your needs, please visit our website, or call one of our locations today.

 

Sources:

https://www.vitas.com/family-and-caregiver-support/grief-and-bereavement/holidays-and-grief/coping-with-grief-during-the-holidays

https://thepsychologygroup.com/how-to-cope-with-grief-during-the-holidays/ https://www.mayoclinichealthsystem.org/hometown-health/speaking-of-health/grief-and-loss-throughout-the-holiday-season

 

Memorial Ideas for Veterans Day

 

Veterans Day is the one dedicated day of the year that Americans can pause and honor those who served in the United States Military. This year, take some time to celebrate and remember our brave service members through special memorial activities. Whether you’re with family, friends, or younger children, you can do plenty of things with others to come together and celebrate what is truly important.

Here are some simple yet special ways to honor our soldiers this Veterans Day: 

·       Read Stories. It can be hard for anyone, especially young ones, to understand what veterans go through when they join the military. Take some time to read some firsthand accounts from veterans so you can get a glimpse of their experience. Once you’ve read some of their stories, it’s easy to see the magnitude of their sacrifice and contribution. It is also a great way to introduce the topic to children, as some kids may need a slower introduction to these discussions.

·       Talk with Veterans. Reach out to veterans in your area to meet with them. Putting a face to a name and starting conversations with veterans is the best way to honor those who lost their lives. Ask questions and let them lead the conversation, taking the time to understand their experience. This allows their legacy to live on long after they are gone.

·       Write a Thank You Note. If you’re not up to meeting face-to-face with a veteran, consider writing a thank-you note. Many local groups and nonprofits will help connect you with a veteran to write to. A Million Thanks is a great organization that can connect you with active and retired service members.

·       Visit a Cemetery. Go to a National Cemetery or a cemetery dedicated to veterans to pay your respects. Walk around and read some of the gravestones, reading the names and the years of their death to envision their experience and possibly learn what war they fought in. If you would like, bring something small to leave in tribute to them, like a small flag or flowers. When in doubt, you can always donate to the cemetery.

·       Go to a Museum. Military museums are all over the country and are great educational resources for you to learn more about American history and the military. Bring the family to make it a day of learning or go by yourself to quietly absorb the information and reflect alone.

·       Attend a Parade. Plenty of local events and parades happen each year in cities and small towns across the country. Check your local community boards, papers, and postings for different parades. Other local events may include races, clothing drives, and other charity events.

Adolf Funeral Home and Cremation Services prides itself on providing exemplary customer service. We take every measure to ensure you are satisfied with all your funeral planning and burial needs during this sensitive time of grief and mourning. We will do whatever it takes to make our positive workplace environment translate to your experience with us.

Adolf Funeral Home has served the Berwyn and Willowbrook areas for many years. We pride ourselves on being large enough to provide professionalism and reliability yet small enough to provide personalized service. To discover more about how we can serve your needs, please visit our website or call one of our locations today.

 

 

Sources:

 https://www.signupgenius.com/groups/veterans-day-activities-ideas.cfm#:~:text=Plan%20a%20Candlelight%20Vigil%20%2D%20Organize,who%20fought%20for%20the%20country.

https://www.va.gov/burials-memorials/memorial-items/

https://www.joincake.com/blog/honoring-veterans/

Pregnancy and Infant Loss Month: How to Help Someone Dealing with Grief

 

Welcoming a new life into the world is a beautiful and miraculous moment. Unfortunately, not everyone is so lucky: 10-15% of pregnancies end in miscarriage and another 1% end in stillbirth. Additionally, more than 5 out of 1,000 infants die within their first year. While those numbers may seem small, pregnancy and infant loss affects more people than you think, including someone you know well. As October is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month, now is a great time to learn how you can support someone after the loss of a baby. 

Everyone handles grief differently, so it's important to remember that what's helpful to one person might not be helpful to another. Regardless, showing support, even in the smallest of ways, can go a long way with any grieving parent.

Look at some of the most helpful tips from parents who have experienced a loss so that you know how to help someone dealing with grief: 

·       Give Space. After the loss of a baby or pregnancy, it's natural to want to offer support to the parents and family however you can. But sometimes, that love can be overwhelming and remind them of the pain and loss they are experiencing. In these times, it can sometimes be best to give the family the space they need to grieve in their own way. Take the lead from them, and follow suit based on their wants. Sometimes the best thing you can do is physically be there for them, making yourself present and willing, without actively talking about the loss. Even your presence can be comforting!

·       Listen. Ask general questions like "how are you?" or "how are you feeling," which will invite them to speak about their grief if they wish to. Once they begin talking, politely but thoughtfully ask more questions about how you can help and listen to what they say. Allowing them to express their feelings can help family members process their grief. If you're unsure what to say, a simple "I'm sorry" is sometimes enough—just acknowledge what they're going through rather than avoid it.

·       Give Practical Assistance. Offer some practical assistance to the family to help them get through this difficult time. Remember, in the case of a stillbirth, a mother will have just gone through the complex process of childbirth and may be physically recovering. Others may not have the emotional stamina to take care of themselves and may not even know what to ask for. Make concrete suggestions, like "can I make you some meals?" or "can I get anything from the grocery store for you?" If they have other children, ask if they need help getting them to school and other appointments or if they need to be driven somewhere. This help can lift a huge burden off their shoulders.

·       Acknowledge the Baby. You may think that avoiding the topic of the baby is the best course of action, but it can be deeply comforting for the parents to acknowledge the baby's existence. Try not to throw anything away, and never refer to the baby as "it." Use the baby's name if appropriate, as it may be one of the few times the parents can use the chosen name. You can also ask other questions about the baby, like the weight, any potential names they were considering, hair color, etc. Recognizing that the baby was a real person, instead of avoiding the topic, can support the parents even more than you know.

·       Check In. Grieving doesn't stop; it just gets easier. No matter how long ago the loss occurred, continue to check in with the family to see how they are feeling and how you can keep supporting them. Many families initially feel supported right after the loss, but when support dwindles over time, it can make loved ones feel isolated. Encourage them to continue processing their feelings, speaking about it as they wish, without telling them to "move on" from their grief. This is especially important during holidays, anniversaries, or birthdays, when the pain of the loss may be brought to the forefront.

Adolf Funeral Home and Cremation Services prides itself on providing exemplary customer service. We take every measure to ensure you are satisfied with all your funeral planning and burial needs during this sensitive time of grief and mourning. We will do whatever it takes to make our positive workplace environment translate to your experience with us. 

Adolf Funeral Home has served the Berwyn and Willowbrook areas for many years. We pride ourselves on being large enough to provide professionalism and reliability yet small enough to provide personalized service. To discover more about how we can serve your needs, please visit our website or call one of our locations today.

 

Sources:

https://www.marchofdimes.org/complications/dealing-with-grief-after-the-death-of-your-baby.aspx

https://healthmatters.nyp.org/tips-to-support-someone-after-the-loss-of-a-baby/

https://www.tommys.org/baby-loss-support/stillbirth-information-and-support/family-and-friends-how-give-support-after-stillbirth